“It’s Always Been Me All Along”

I used to think that life was unfair to me
Used to say that love wasn’t meant for me
Felt like each time I dove into it, I was in to drown myself
It seemed everyone I’ve been with owed me some kind of apology
The grudge I had kept so tied in my heart
I saw all their mistakes but failed to realize my own faults
I thought for a while that I was the perfect one
Like everyone was there to hurt my guarded heart
And so I threw diamonds and stones in the same ground
I could care less what became of them
I’ve never had to rethink my decisions
I was determined to do as I said

For so long I’ve been in denial
I had thought I was invisible
I had seen myself to be that special one no one could resist
I lied to myself too many times
I praised my foolishness so well
That it was all I could see at the time
I had felt my heart was too precious to let go
I had given no chance to the deep end
I felt larger than life for a while
And now I see myself so clearly

I can see just how much I have missed
I can see just how many times I’ve been misplaced
I can see I was never really right
I know now what I should have known long before now
The heart I had kept so guarded so long
Now feels empty but heavy with loneliness
I tried to be what I shouldn’t
I feel like I’m finally ready to take that step
I’m ready to be a better me
I’m ready to just live and worry less
I’m ready to take all the possible risks needed
It’s all crystal clear to me now
It’s always been me all along

I just hope it’s not too late to start over again