“Commitment: The Dream or Doom?”


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“….Will you marry me?” The phrase every maturing girl/lady/woman dreams to hear someday; and a phrase every maturing man gets nervous about as he gradually approaches the moment.
Although, females usually have the thought that, “this may be the one,” every time, in a relationship, whether it’s a new one or its  been on for a while, it’s a thought that’s configured at the back of the mind.
For men, it’s not something they plan for or look forward to, in fact, it’s their most dreaded moment in life. The moment of realization that, he would be tied to one woman forever, not being able to do the ‘guy’s thing’ anymore, he would have to share a space in his life forever, and there comes raising kids! Heartbeat!
The lady is, however,the one ready for commitment most times, as long as her feelings are well nurtured and she’s happy within her heart, why not! But then, the moment suddenly comes! He’s proposing to her, her heart just stops for a while, and it all comes rushing in her mind; “am I ready for this?” “How will I cope?” “Is this what I really want?” “Are we gona be happy together?” “I should probably call my….. oh no, he’s right in front of me now,” in a split second, her mind is driven to a million thoughts. And there’s the gentleman, still waiting for an answer and he’s thinking, “oh crap! Is she gona turn me down now?” “Maybe I should have waited,” “does she even want to be with me?” “Damn if she says no, I’m just gona…” Then she finally says, “yes I will” and he’ll happily put the ring in her finger; or she says, “no, I’m not ready,” and he’s staring and thinking, “what da…” or she says, “I need sometime to think about it.” Now, in this case, the clock just stops ticking for a moment and they are both thinking, “is this the dream, or doom for us?”
Well, I’ll leave the question open-
What do you think? Commitment: The dream or doom?

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8 thoughts on ““Commitment: The Dream or Doom?”

  1. simple…..a dream when you’ve found the right person and doom when u haven’t. though i don’t agree that its the ladies that are more ready for commitment. i think of recent the rules are changing

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    • Thanks Joyce for the input. Although one thing still puzzles me, the response, “I need sometime to think about it.” It does sound more of a doom to me, to be honest. But what’s your own take on that? What could that mean? From a female angle…

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    • Both may wait longer, but men still have no time limit to live the dream. Rules don’t kill biology even if the dream changes a bit. Yes less kids later marriages more divorces in every country. But as a whole the customs still holds true in this world. Don’t mistake new trends as far as mobile people as the new social norm.

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      • Hmmm
        From what I picked up from your comment now, ELM, no matter the changes we encounter in the society, somethings will always remain the same….

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  2. lol…i know that line is overrated but I think when the questions are popped up unexpectedly you might actually need time to think. and on the other side, thinking too much has its effects because your mind could just travel where it shouldnt

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    • I totally agree with you on that. Before diving into the sea, better to consider the possibilities of drowning or floating. But but but… why lead a man on for so long, only to come up with, “give me sometime to think about it.” Wasn’t there enough time to think through the possibility of him popping the question sometime? Or was it a relationship of convenience in the first place? The truth is, EVERYONE in a relationship knows what they really want as they go into it, so there’s absolutely nothing to really think about, that you haven’t really done before that moment. To me, the time to think is there and then, when the question is asked, and not a day after or many days to come, it’s simply unfair. That’s what I think though…

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      • Men earn the women and women at times lose the man. First meet of a woman she is a Goddess perfect, but each question comment is like a wife/slut test and women may fall from the Queen realm to the stand by world. As man earn their way to her top she weighs her options more and more as they seem to dwindle, as his seem to grow.

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      • Wow! “Wife/hoe tests”
        Nice one ELM. I think I can relate to what you’ve just mentioned. Just like my fiance will tell me, “A hoe is a pit stop for a quick snack, but a wife must be the center and the home for the man.”
        Could you tell more about this “wife/hoe tests” questions? I think we all would like to learn of this, coming from a man….
        Many thanks ELM

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