The foundation of a lasting relationship is based on “Trust.” Trust is; when you have full knowledge of all the odds and challenges of what a relationship may have, but you refuse to let those things come between you and your partner, because, you are strong enough, emotionally, and have full confidence in your partner to always try to do right, even if, every human is prone to weakness (not that it’s an excuse for anyone to cheat on you). But, when you stop trusting, and start imagining things in your relationship; those things you fear and nag about all the time, may as well be played in reality someday.
You cannot love a person completely if you keep making a movie of an unhappy ending, in your wild imaginations. Some go to extreme measures to catch the ‘fowl,’ by confiding in other people, to investigate their relationship on their behalf. Now, the problem with these private investigators you hire, is that, they are too good to fail you in your suspicions; they just never get it wrong with you, even if the story may be just a fiction they have carefully played out.
Jealousy in a relationship is healthy, it shows a sense of security over your partner. But, many mistake possession for security; that’s when jealousy becomes unhealthy. The moment you start getting too paranoid over your relationship, and all you do is nag the hell out of your partner’s ears, you are threading on a path of losing them to the horror you have always feared; the other person, and at that point, they just don’t care how you feel anymore!
There are ways to have a healthy jealousy over your partner without sending them into the arms of another; sometimes, you pretend to have moved on, but it still hurts when you see that they are happier with the other person you lost them to; newsflash: you let them slip away!
A mature mind knows not to cause unnecessary scene or unhealthy and unproductive suspicions that are baseless, only to lose the one they love to their possessiveness and insecurity. Stay sane, and learn to trust your own, regardless of what anyone says to you, not everyone is happy with what you have, be careful not to shoot yourself in the leg out of a mere child’s play of jealousy!
Eva thoughts 
concerning hiring investigators, though some people take it extreme it might be needed in some cases…..if the guy eventually hooks up with the ” investigator” I hired, for instance,.it might be safe to say they were probably meant to be
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joyce,
thank you for your comment.
if two people meet and find passion, it does’t always mean that they were meant to happen, sometimes it’s just to teach one a lesson never to thread on that path ever again! if you agree to be with someone, and you can’t trust the little you know about them, there’s no point for a private investigator, in this case, it’s either you leave them alone, or you just let go of your negative thoughts. no one can be trusted with your relationship, there’s no need for a 3rd party..
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Worst thing we all do is let the past condition our present, and dictate our future. Often what we don’t seem to realize is that, every word we say, aura we give, action we take towards the other, creates another person in response. And every word, we do and don’t say is also creating our relationship boundaries and contract. We train others to us in our interaction, be it sane, silly, or suspect. The way we do and say this will dictate the actions of the other more than not, because we are building are relationship dynamics. When we don’t invest in it productively and rely on fear we create issues. Our focus on fear will make it a reality. Relationships are difficult and scary at times. Relationships are wonderful and fulfilling too. Which do u invest in?
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Every relationship has it’s own ups and downs, but a good relationship is one that is of mutual understanding and respect. By investing in our relationship, we create walls around us, no one will be fit to climb. So it’s always good and wise to keep it in the relationship, without involving the third-party into it.
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